Inside Vermonhampshire, the Johnsotons are making their casserdish. Joy Ellen Marton is whipping up a casserole in her midsize Montpelier home. Her children are in another roo- Eddie Johnson hits a baseball that pop flies out of the batting machine off his bat into his living room window. He smells hot dish from insi- Joy Ellen hears her children fighting over the iPad in the other room. The charger is torn near the brick. She needs to buy a new one. She hears a jolt and jumps. It's just the toaster.
Away! Across the house, her husband picks up the phone. Fuck, broken window. Across state lines. The Martons' Monroe, New Hampshire Window Repair truck rolls sleepily out of the driveway for the emergency customer. This is all for the best. This is about loyalty to a customer.
The Martons' van rolls across the New Hampshire/Vermont border at 15 to 9. He rolls over the curb on the turn into the next town. Ryan Marton places the gas spout at the QuikTrip into the car gas tank. It doesn't go in at first, perhaps a slight bend in the spout. Eventually, after some finagling, it slides in. He aims exactly for 35 dollars. He gets $35.04.
Eddie Johnson sits facing the wall in a chair. His father, Steven, walks into the room. "Have you thought enough yet about what you did?"
"I'm telling you, I did, Dad."
"Oh, he's calling. Give it another 10 minutes. I don't believe you."
He opens the phone. Call from the new window guy. This guy is trying. Could be trying a little harder. His voice is familiar.
Joy Ellen calls her husband as he's 4 minutes away from the broken window. He takes precisely 6 seconds to decide whether to answer. If you were to ask him, it would have felt like. He hangs up. He tells himself he'll call when he's done.
"I'm almost to the window" He texts
Three dots. They disappear.
Ryan drops to his knees in the driveway. Not here not here not here not here not he- Steven rings him again. There is no response. I thought it was a different Steven Johnson it can't be him, there's no wa- Steven calls Ryan as if hitting the call button harder will make the ring louder. Ryan hits the answer button.
"It's Ryan Johnson."
"Huh?"
"You know what I said."
"Get in here."
Question:
When family loses each other, how do they come back together?
Fact 1:
Ryan Marton uses a false last name.
Fact 2:
Dad's house is Steven Johnson's house.
Fact 3:
Steven Johnson has not changed his name.
Fact 4:
At 16 and 12, the Johnson's dad was sentenced to prison for possession/sale of heroin.
Eddie Johnson is facing the wall exactly like his father used to do when Ryan walks in. He hears a water bottle drop to the floor. He hears something along the lines of crying and screaming at the same time. He peeks out of his room to see them hugging. Their expression says they missed each other even if they hate each other. He'll understand when he's older.
"You kept the Johnson name?"
"Yeah."
"Is he still in prison?"
"Yes."
A grin sneaks across Ryan's face. He doesn't want to look happy about it but he's clearly overjoyed and feels relief at this knowledge. Steven also wishes he felt worse about it but puts a hand on Ryan's shoulder to let him know he's relieved also. Ryan feels a little sick about how much Steven still looks like him. He still reeks of cigarettes too. Another call from Joy Ellen. Decline. A text.
"why are you there?"
He doesn't know. It hurts to be in there, but it hurts in a way that makes him feel like he's growing up.
You have stopped sharing your location with Joy Ellen.
Steven puts his hand out again but hesitates this time and drops the hand before it can reach Ryan's shoulder. Ryan shudders when he sees the way his dad used to do the same thing.
2 beers deep. 7 phone calls from Joy Ellen deep. 20 texts too. And 3 voicemails. Sigh. One more beer deep.
"How would I explain this to anyone?"
"Explain what?"
"That I found you."
"Just tell them you found me. This was a coincidence. I didn't know your new name. You thought I was a different Steven Johnson. None of this is your fault."
"Then why does it feel like I let him win?"
"He's not winning, Ryan. He's in jail."
"I just feel like he would be too happy about this. He got punished for his job, but not for leaving us days at a time. I don't want him to get the payoff."
"Well, that's why you ran when he went away, huh?"
The beating in Ryan's chest turns into something similarly impactful but more malevolent. His phone is vibrating again.
"Why do you still act like him?"
"I don't know."
"Because... you know, I pray it's different here."
"You know he always treated me better than you. Maybe I just don't have such hard feelings is all. Psh. Listen to me. Remembering why you ran away again yet?"
"Haha, yeah."
Ryan sees Eddie peek from around the corner. He looks at his kid. He looks panicked at Steven and doesn't know how to react.
"Hey, buddy. The repair guy was having some trouble with the window, so he was taking a break."
"The repair guy also drank a bit too," whispers Ryan under his breath.
"Well, the repair guy can stay on the couch if he needs to."
Two hours later, Ryan finally answers call #25.
"What are you doing there?"
"Steven still lives there apparently."
"Steven? Like your brother?"
She can tell it sends enough of a sting through Ryan that he has to take 8 seconds to respond.
"Yes, Joy, that Steven."
"Oh god, I'm sorry. How are you feeling?"
"Terrible. But he's giving me room to feel about it. One way he's like Dad I guess."
"I want to chuckle at that but I'm not going to."
"I appreciate your honesty. Hey, we had a couple beers tonight and- hey, yeah, I know how I handle it. Since you won't let me forget. Would you be terribly upset if I just stayed the night and came back in the morning?"
"Do what you need to do. I'm off work tomorrow so I can take care of the kids."
"I'm sorry. I know I told you I wouldn't be forcing you to do all the childcare stuff all the time."
"Well thanks for acknowledging. Now get to bed, it's late."
"Yeah, I about beat you to it. Goodnight."
"Goodnight."
He falls asleep on the couch. It feels softer than it used to. It looks the same. It feels the same. But something about the night makes it feel more welcoming than it used to.
He starts dreaming about that one time when CPS came. After the third guy passed out in the lawn, the agent took Ryan's hand and started asking him things about his father. "Did the house smell funny? Did he give you weird medicines? Did he hurt you?"
He never hurt his kids, well not Ryan at least. He had a habit of facing a chair against a wall for timeouts. My theory was that he just didn't want to be looked at. He certainly returned the favor. It felt like I could light a fire, and Dad wouldn't even look in my direction. Oh well, he stopped looking often enough that I could take care of myself. Now Steven helped here and there, no doubt about it. He knew Dad would at least acknowledge him. Not often, but enough. I still didn't want to stick around after Dad went away I guess. I just couldn't handle the thought of not being looked at again.